The 12 Steps as used by Alcoholics anonymous (AA) Narcotics anonymous (NA) Al-anon Cocaine anonymous (CA) Gamblers anonymous (GA) Emotions anonymous (EA) Sex and Love addicts (SALA) anonymous Co dependents anonymous (CODA). The twelve steps recovery program saved my life and brought some peace of mind into my life. As I write this I have been involved in 3 twelve step recovery fellowships and have been a member of alcoholics anonymous for 33 years. I have learnt a lot in that time from my sponsor and other wise people from all walks of life. I have taken “a bit of this and bit of that” from many sources of wisdom.
I want to share with you how my sponsor suggested how I do the twelve steps. When you look at the steps only one word changed. The “requirement for membership”. The rest of the steps are about building character (emotional muscle), getting rid of guilt, fear and resentment, making amends, and being able to look the world in the eye “to get a Teflon personality”. If you want to be “happy, joyous and free” then it is suggested you do the 12 steps in a way that takes courage. To see yourself as the problem and not the world. After doing the steps I learned that it was me not people or actions that were the problem, but my reaction. I soon learned that other people’s actions I can not do anything about!. But I can change my reactions.
If you are a person that is in an emotional turmoil then something has to change, it can’t be the past and it can’t be the future but we can change now. “The present is a result of the past and the future is a result of the present”.
Honesty, Open Mind ness, Willingness. Are a good frame of mind to be in before you start the 12 steps !
This is where we have to look at our behaviour, reactions, guilt’s, resentments, our fears. These are what rob us of our peace of mind!. Peace of mind sounds so good. Does it seem so far away?. Do you think, “Well mate, if you had my problems you would not have peace of mind either!”. Well you do have peace of mind, it is inside of you right now!. Right there, yes, right inside of you!. “No, I have not”, you may be thinking. Well it’s there!. Yes, honestly it is. But it may be covered in “dust” and that “dust” may be resentment, guilt, fear, self pity, living in the past, in the future, living in the guilty past. Blow that dust away and you have peace of mind!. In short “PRACTICE OPPOSITES”.
That is what the steps are about, learning to practice opposites. If you are unhappy now, then practice the opposite of “thinking”, “reactions”, “resentment”, “low self-esteem”, “guilt” etc. Just practice opposites and that is what The 12 steps is all about.
see http://www.the12steps.com